Dear My Future Husband:
I have a fear, that turns into a question. What if we found each other, and we ended up getting married. Everything is perfect, and the one thing I know you want and the one thing I want to give you I can’t, a child.
What if I can’t produce a baby that will hold our legacy? What I if I can’t give you the son you may have always dreamed of to teach how be a man? The son you would want to take to sports games and teach how to play basketball. What if I can’t give you that daughter that looks like me and treat her like your little princess? That daughter that you would take to the daddy-daughter dance. What if I cant give you those things you want in a family, would you still love me? What if our family became just us?
Would you still love me if I couldn’t fulfill the things I feel make me a woman? What if I fall short as a wife and belong your helpmate? What if I gain weight? What if I don’t make you smile anymore? What if you no longer find me attractive? Would you still love? Would I still be the apple in your eye?
I’m fearful because all of this is real. What if?